6. Self-Made Monsters (overview)

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2006

A man called Syd

About a year, a year and a half, ago I had this splendid idea of making a small Flash based game, basically a point and click puzzle that would use Pink Floyd covers (mostly by Hipgnosis) in a kind of interactive way. I made a preloader (a pink pig, of course) and an introduction that consisted of 16 Floyd covers that had to be clicked in chronological order during the game. Puzzle #1 (of 16!) was based on the famous See Emily Play 'train' cover that uses a drawing from Syd Barrett himself. Add to that...

Tourette's Planet (18+)

The Unfinished Projects category was originally set up for those old ideas that are floating in my brain but that were not realized for a lot of obvious silly reasons. The fact that I have not started cataloguing these Projects on this page is because I am using exactly the same obvious silly reasons for not opening my blog editor. So here is an idea I came up with this week, perhaps it could turn into a short science fiction story as the plot is really too meagre to full a complete novel. The trigger...

2007

The Abandon Earth Kit aka How To Leave The Planet

Don't panic! This 'Unfinished Projectst' of mine has finally been, euh, finished. It contains a text from Douglas Adams that he once wrote for a shoe company. A Belgium shoe company! Although written in Flash it isn't flashy at all. You are warned. How To Leave The Planet Update February 2009: How To Leave The Planet is one of Douglas Adams’s most obscure texts. Obscure as in rare. None of the regular biographies mention it and only Neil Gaiman in his not-quite-a-biography-but-very-close-to-it...

The Pink Floyd Pie Chart

From time to time I get these weird ideas. Most of those just stay buried in my head. You have maybe already wondered why there is a Star Trek category on this blog with two and a half and only two and a half messages inside. That is because I had (and still have) this crazy plan to write a sequel to an original Star Trek episode. Because I often wondered, what happens with the inhabitants of a certain planet after Kirk leaves the crease? I even downloaded some population viability software and that came...

True Story

It was the time of year when the evenings were cold and dark and SDSL routers gave up transmitting bits and bytes per kilobit and kilobyte. It was also the time of year to call the helpdesk that gets loads of money for a guaranteed 24/24 7/7 technical service. - Belgastar helpdesk, Jeroen speaking, how can I be of service to you?- Jeroen, My SDSL router broke down.- Indeed sir, I can see that.- Thanks for monitoring my line. Now send me a repair team right a way.- Sir, it is Friday night 10 pm.- Yes and?-...

2008

Don't mention the war

German radio- and television-administration, die Gebühreneinzugszentrale (GEZ), send several letters to a Mr. Friedrich Schiller with the urgent question to pay his radio- and television-tax. These arrived at a local primary school in Weigsdorf-Köblitz (Saksen) and its principal replied that the German poet, philosopher, historian and dramatist the administration was looking for had been dead for over 200 years. Schiller is world renowned for his Ode an die Freude that was put to music by a certain Mr....

EUlogy

What follows is a rather boring post, but I've spent a lot of time writing it, so I'll publish it anyway. Sorry for that. My country, although you probably won’t believe me, was one of the founding dwarfs of the European Union. Belgium itself is an amalgam of three different nationalities that, due to several historical atrocities, were cut off from their original fatherland, whether they liked it or not. Because Germany, Holland, France (and even England) had better things to do than to quarrel who...

Franco's Frocks

Douglas Adams once wrote a column, not one of his best - I might add, about New Year's resolutions but I won't go further in that. You might otherwise think that I am one of those I am your biggest fan guys that stick knives in author's overfed bellies just because they destroyed all parallel instances of planet earth. See also: Stephen King. But there is one thing we both agree on and that is that New Year's resolutions can and may easily be forgotten starting from January the second. So why does one...

Killer Mum

Last week my ma came to visit me and the first thing she said after she had entered was: “Comb your hair!” I took the order, because that was what it was, as an insult and retorted that as far as I could remember she was in my house that I had bought with my dough and that after 48 years of living it was about time for me to do what I thought was good for me to do. My father grinned inconspicuously and my LA-girl sighed and told her mother-in-law that she had since long given up trying to mess with my...

Minestrone

I once found this interesting theory about how cosmogony took place. This may not be how it exactly happened but I like it so it's fine for me. In the beginning, although you need some notion of time to coin that phrase and there wasn't any time to begin with you had nothing. Now this nothingness was a kind of crystal-clear soup. A glass of pure water has neutral (read: zero) acidity or alkalinity. It is safe to drink. Next to it is another glass. Its content has also a neutral pH. It is also colourless....

Ringmaster

A few days ago in a ridiculously overcrowded bus somewhere inside the bowels of the local souk at the inner town of Brussels a chador-veiled beauty offered me her seat. I politely refused, trying not to drown into those big brown virgin eyes of her. My face turned red, partly from those fresh spring inner fluids that suddenly rushed through my veins, partly from a streak of anger that blitzkrieged through my body. A woman just offered me her seat in the bus. It suddenly appeared to me that old age had...

The Cross and the Maiden

Yesterday I went to a biannual charity meeting in my village after my LA-girl had chained my hands and feet and dragged me over. I am not and will never be a social person and to enter a sport complex filled with 200 people I have never met is rather close to a living nightmare. If Tartarus exists my eternal punishment will be exactly that. But in the end it turned out to be not that bad because actually we knew about a dozen of good doers and after we had said hello to them all the event was almost over....

2009

Saint Cecilia

My brain is like a sieve, did sing the very underrated Thomas Dolby on a sunny day once, but today Felix suddenly had a heroine-like-flash of memories from, what he thought were, his anarchic student days. Try to visualise young Felix Atagong, pimple faced jam jarred glassed weirdo who was frenetically trying to belong somewhere, anywhere, but has always been too afraid to do so. Caught in a crossfire of childhood and boredom, brought up in the deep-rooted Flemish catholic tradition that it is not done to...

True Story (part 3, the horror returns)

I duly want to apologize to the person of the Isabel helpdesk for shouting at him, on Monday morning, that he could fuck himself just before I smashed down the phone. I only wanted to know if the Isabel utility was compatible with Windows 7 - that's all - but getting an actual answer on that simple question was something else. Isabel is, or better was, the ingenious software that was devised by a conglomeration of Belgian banks to help the industry automate their bank movements. In the past when a company...

True Story (the sequel)

One of the latest buzzwords is efficiency. Companies are streamlining their products and services in such a way that customer service, productivity and expenses are optimized although result wise it mostly is in reverse order and with limited success. There comes a time that the different concepts clash. Last week I had 3 encounters with different helpdesks and all of them guided me, in name of efficiency, wrong. HTC On Monday I received a HTC smartphone that had been lying in an empty desk at work. I...

2010

Dymocracy (True Story VI)

I can be such a prick sometimes and I wouldn't like to be one of my own colleagues. Because Dell delivered a truckload of computers at the place I pretend to work I found it a pretty neat idea to stick some labels on the machines. I knew there had been a Dymo label maker in our company before but it had disappeared in the mist of time. Time to call the office equipment department. The office equipment department (OED), in our company, is regarded as the earthly equivalent of a black hole. It is a...

True Story V, Atagong's continuing struggle with helpdesks...

One of my daily jobs as an IT monkey, next to changing printer toner that for some members of the company I work for seems to be a task of gargantuan proportions, is to take care of the safety of our network. Although our (rented) mail server has a sophisticated anti-virus and spam removal system (if I may believe the blurb), the firewall has a daily updated spam and anti-virus protection (if I may believe the expensive maintenance contract) and the individual workstations have a top-notch anti-virus...

When in shit, call IT (True Story IV)

This is a true story.Again.I work for the Belgian branch of a company that has a few thousand employees and this week it was big chief powwow day, meaning that the meeting room would be constantly visited by people of slowly descending picking order until the bosses would find someone they could blame for whatever reason they would like to blame him (or her) for. The CEO invaded the meeting room, with in his slipstream the three vice-CEO-s (we like to call them the holy trinity) representing sales and...

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Sitemap Per Category

Overview for 1. General Mish Mash.

Overview for 2. DNA.

Overview for 3. Gamebits.

Overview for 4. Orb Weavers.

Overview for 5. The Pink Thing.

Overview for 6. Self-Made Monsters.

Overview for 7. Star Trek - The Original Sucker.

Overview for 8. Unfinished.

Overview for 9. I, Pod.

Overview for a. ArianeB.

Overview for b. Dirk Gently.

Overview for c. The Sandbox Of God.

Overview for d. Shot-Online Calculator.

Overview for e. Adult Oriented Games.

Overview for The Holy Church of Iggy the Inuit.


Sitemap generated on 2010 10 24.
Coded by Felix Atagong.