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Entry 1030 posted in: 1. General Mish Mash

The Map I came home with a broad smile on my face because I found out at my local book- and DVD shop that the cult-series of the Sixties The Prisoner has finally reached this continent. Years before Twin Peaks, years before Lost (getting stupider and stupider by the episode, pardon me for not watching it anymore), The Prisoner was Britain’s most haunting and psychedelic TV experience. Of course the series only got better and better in my mind and I can only hope that watching the seventeen parts, 40 years after they have been made, will not turn into a bad trip, or even worse, into a kind of Austin Powers flashback show.

Trifles light as air
Are to the jealous confirmations strong
As proofs of holy writ

I was subliminally thinking of Iago’s wise words (Othello, Act III, scene III ) when I started reading The Seven Words You Can’t Say On Television by Steven Pinker. It is an essay about the use of profanities in our culture and how cultural, ideological and legal systems react to the use of so-called obscene words. The democratic governments have lost the battle against the printed word, at least when the printed four letter words are presented as literature, but in the daily newspaper flow, and certainly on television, several words are still prohibited for whatever reason. In the famous ‘seven wordsGeorge Carlin routine (Steven Pinker named his essay after it) we are told that the palindrome tit may not be used on television, but, paradoxically enough, boob, also a palindrome, and relating to exactly the same amount of human tissue, is allowed without a problem. One can only guess why or why not.

Of course the meaning of words changes over the years, as the poet Enderby tries to explain on stage, in one of Anthony Burgess’ funnier novels. The poet ends up as a substitute for the male lead in an American musical based on the life of Shakespeare and feels it necessary to analyse the dialogue when the actor playing Shakespeare’s son uses a word that is quite common now but that had a different meaning in the sixteenth century.

Do not call me dad. Dad is a term used only for an illegitimate father. In other words, only a bastard may use it. You, whatever you are, are not a bastard. (Taken from: Enderby’s Dark Lady)

The bard himself had a way of words, but this is not always appreciated by the public, like Mr Poynder who has a great deal to say about the use of the womb word in Macbeth, Act V, scene VIII.

To my mind it’s a disgrace that schoolbooks can be printed with such words in them. I’m sure if any of us had ever known that Shakespeare was that kind of stuff, we’d have put our foot down at the start. It surprises me, I must say. Only the other morning I was reading a piece in my News Chronicle about Shakespeare being the father of English Literature; well, if that’s Literature, let’s have a bit LESS Literature, say I! (Taken from: A Clergymans’s Daughter (George Orwell))

Watching reruns of the A-Team I still find it strange that acts of hyper violence could pass through the censor’s scissors without a problem. That kind of violence normally leads to a bloody mess but that term is something you will seldom hear on television.

America, the greatest nation in the world, has always amazed me by its ability of turning the ridicule into the obvious. It scares the shit out of me that the greatest country in the world will have a vice president who believes that dinosaurs and humans lived happily together about 6000 years ago. What is the ideological convergence between Osama Bin Laden and Sarah Palin? Let's hope America never sees a (vice)-president who wants to quicken the last judgment by pushing the red button… a wish some Muslims (Al-Qiyamah) and Christians have in common.

Sometimes my amazement turns into a state of headshaking unbelief, for instance when Pinker writes that in 1999 an aide to the mayor of Washington DC resigned because he had used the word niggardly during a meeting. My Merriam Webster has the following to say about the word:

nig.gard.ly adj (1571) 1: grudgingly mean about spending or granting: begrudging 2: provided in meanly limited supply syn see stingy -- nig.gard.li.ness n -- niggardly adv

The word has got nothing to do with the term nigger that arrived, still according to my dictionary, 130 years later. The term, derived from negro or nègre, wasn’t offensive in the beginning, just like cunt in the fifteen hundreds, both words acquired a taboo meaning centuries later.

The essay The Seven Words You Can’t Say On Television has now been published as a separate booklet. Originally it was a chapter of Steven Pinker’s The Stuff of Thought. This shows that swearwords do have a market.

The Stuff of Thought counts 512 pages and can be bought for 9.99£, The Seven Words You Can’t Say On Television with its 96 pages clocks at 3.99£. It doesn’t take a genius to compute that swearwords have an economical advantage of 2.1301301301301301301301301301301 to 1. So you better handle them with care.

These sentences, to sugar, or to gall,
Being strong on both sides, are equivocal:
But words are words; I never yet did hear
That the bruised heart was pierced through the ear.
I humbly beseech you, proceed to the affairs of state.
Othello, Act I, scene III

If you liked this post - you might be interested in this as well: Holy Cow 


Anthony Stern Photoshoot

Entry 1035 posted in: The Holy Church of Iggy the Inuit

A couple of posts ago it was prophesised that some of Anthony Stern’s unpublished Iggy pictures would find their way to the public...

15 previously unreleased pictures
signed copies soon available
exclusively at The City Wakes

The Holy Church of Iggy the Inuit

Don't mention the war

Entry 1036 posted in: 6. Self-Made Monsters

Franz Ferdinand German radio- and television-administration, die Gebühreneinzugszentrale (GEZ), send several letters to a Mr. Friedrich Schiller with the urgent question to pay his radio- and television-tax. These arrived at a local primary school in Weigsdorf-Köblitz (Saksen) and its principal replied that the German poet, philosopher, historian and dramatist the administration was looking for had been dead for over 200 years. Schiller is world renowned for his Ode an die Freude that was put to music by a certain Mr. Ludwig van Beethoven in his Ninth symphony and that became the official European anthem in 1972.

But of course one does not mess with administration, especially not the German one. Believing that this was the biggest scam in German television-tax history the GEZ now wanted solid proof that Mr. Friedrich Schiller was indeed dead and not merely acting dead to avoid taxes. The German newspapers do not reveal how this was achieved but finally a spokeswoman from the tax-administration accepted that a database error had been made and that Mr. Friedrich Schiller had died before television and radio had been invented.

At the current annual fee of 200 Euros Friedrich Schiller already owed the German state 40.600 euros.

Nur der Irrtum ist das Leben, und das Wissen ist der Tod.
Only mistakes are alive, and knowledge is dead.
(Friedrich Schiller, Kassandra).

In everyday life I am an IT monkey for a service company and because I used to be the only one around who spoke German I was always the first to be chosen as a volunteer to deal with our neighbours from the East.

One day one of my colleagues had a small problem with a manager of a German Kooperation we had recently joined. She had send the German administrative unit a small note saying that the Belgian partner would not be able to render any service on the 21st of July, because that date happens to be the Belgian national day. It is that day, we Belgians snicker, that working people have a day off and the king has to do something to earn his pay for a change.

The message was not well received by the Head Administrator of the German cooperation. They send a page long official letter, signed, sealed and delivered, that according to the rules of their Arian brotherhood no member could close its offices on any other day than those confirmed by German law, number such and so, paragraph whatever.

The girl was nearly in tears from anger when I came in. She had already tried to explain, by phone, fax and mail to the representative of the Herrenvolk that this was our National day and that there would be no need whatsoever for us to stay vigilant to render service to companies that were closed anyway. Can you do something, she sighted.

I took the phone. Called the bloke. Explained him that since he had already lost two wars against Belgium we were considering ourselves as an independent country and not a mere province belonging to the German federal republic. It was quiet for a while. For a moment I feared I had done a Franz Ferdinand that would lead to World-War III. But he understood. Sometimes you just have to shout a little bit harder as they do.

If you liked this post - you might be interested in this as well: EUlogy


Autumn Blues

Entry 1041 posted in: 3. Gamebits, a. ArianeB, c. The Sandbox Of God, e. Adult Oriented Games

Recently I have been in my cynical go-get’em-all mode and I want to apologise for that. I blame it on the season but it could of course also be that my bad character is beyond fixing.

The following text (part 1 and 2) is about gameplay for adults. If your legislation forbids to read this under a certain age and if you are under that certain age you are advised to skip the first two entries of this post and to read only part 3, which is about The Sandbox of God.

On the other hand, if your religion forbids you to read about gameplay involving divine powers as well then this post is entirely not for you.

Settled? Can we go on now please?

It's spaghetti time again! Set 1. ArianeB add-on

I can’t deny it. Most visitors of my little blog don’t come here to read my philosophical musings, but to check the ArianeB section.

ArianeB or Virtually Date Ariane is a free adult click-n-play game, made by an anonymous human being who roams the net under the same name. Insiders more or less know who hides behind that pseudonym but it is not my task to divulge that information. It suffices to say he is rather interested in the intersections between mathematics and 3D graphics.

I can’t blame the man, it is easier to explain the mathematical formula A ∩ (B ∩ C) = (A ∩ B) ∩ C by saying that
a: if Rebecca is skinny dipping in the pool with ArianeB and
b: if you join ArianeB in the pool for a good old game of booby touching
the chance is big that
c: the three of you are in the same pool at the same time.
That is what they call apllied mathematics.

ArianeB 5.0 still contains some bugs in the coding, meaning that some action sometimes trigger the wrong events or pictures. Erana was one of the first to create an add-on to get rid of these bugs and to add some extra features as well.

Soon after that I was contacted by Arnulf who made an add-on for the add-on, if you understand what I mean, but my appetite for ArianeB was a bit tempered by then as I had played it about a hundred times just to make these goddamn walkthroughs. So I never added Arnulf’s creation to this blog.

But when I recently checked the forum where Arnulf posts his versions I found that his add-on has now reached version number 12. It is about 16 MB big and can be downloaded from RapidShare. Expect no walkthrough from me this time. You’re on your own!

Wendy v1 v2 v3 Set 2. An Afternoon at the Swimming Pool

The forum where any new incarnation of ArianeB (and the add-ons) is closely scrutinised belongs to Shark’s Lagoon. Shark has made quite a few sexy adventures and one of his most popular creations, Horny Afternoon, has now been extended to episode 3. In An afternoon at the swimming pool we meet Wendy, her nanny aptly called Nanny, a friend from school Cloé and, of course, Franck, the handyman who comes in handy in different ways.
(Part 2 of Horny Afternoon can be found here: Another very special afternoon. Some more information about Shark in old posts of mine: Sense And Sensibility and Cyberhugging.)

For those who have not the patience to play the new game until the end (and then once again because there are different endings and then once again because it is so damn good) Arnulf, oh no not HIM again!, has made a 24 minutes during movie with all the situations in the game. That 64 MB video walkthrough can be downloaded from Rapidshare as well. Damn, and I also wanted to make a visual guidel. There go my extra 1,000 visitors a week!

Sandbox of God Set 3. The Sandbox of God  

Far less people join this little blog to check The Sandbox of God walkthroughs. I can’t figure out why. Apparently the urge to procreate, even virtually, is far more appealing than playing god in a world populated by rabbits and men. But please bear with me for a moment.

This is what I had to say about the game in 2006:

The story itself is monotonous, the graphics are tacky, but in a strange way the game is very addictive. Before you know it hours have gone by because you still have not managed to create Volcano city or instigate world peace between rabbits and men.

The game is indeed very addictive and it is not very strange that it has acquired a loyal following. People have asked for a SoG sequel but for one reason or another, its maker, Mr. Chubigans wasn’t too keen to start producing one.

Until the following message appeared on Mr. Chubigan’s blog on the 24th of February of this year:
Sandbox of God 2: Ancient Warfare is coming April 20th.

But less than a month later it was already announced that the game would not meet its deadline and that the release date would probably be June of this year. June past by like a whirlwind and Mr. Chubigans was obliged to make another statement:

I think it’s time for a SOG 2 update, eh? I’ll be completely honest here: the project is stalled for now. Fred has gotten quite a few sprites done but there are still plenty more to go. On my end, only the night/day cycle is done. There is still much, much more work to do.

And the Vertigo Gaming unofficial FAQ has the following message:

Q: Sandbox of God 2?
A: I'm not prepared to say anything about that right now, and whether it's still going/canceled.

Blaming it on the season or not, this is quite depressing news. But instead of jerking off to ArianeB or Wendy, why don’t you just download The Sandbox of God and play with bunnies for a change?

If you liked this post - you might be interested in this one as well: Tentacle Day 



Do you like tennis? (ArianeB 5.10 walkthrough [online version])

Entry 1049 posted in: a. ArianeB

NEW: THE ARIANEB WALKTHROUGHS have now got their own domain:

Tennis lesson by Rebecca I am like Starship Titanic on a collision course with the world. This week I was annoyed by MySpace who suddenly started to address me in French. It is a common error from multi-language websites to address me in the wrong language because I use a Dutch Windows but with a French keyboard configuration. The differences between French and Belgian keyboards are so minimal that some keyboards only exist in French such as my Dell multimedia RT 7D30. Luckily MySpace suggested that I could adjust my settings on my personal configuration page. Which I did and that is what really infuriated me. Read all about it on my MySpace blog if you care, but as the technical matter is apparently fixed I won’t bring it up here again.

A mail from Arnulf (one of the moderators at the Shark’s Lagoon Forum) made me realise two things.

First. Arnulf’s add-on for ArianeB 5.0 has now been upgraded to version 13. This version contains the Erana hack that was presented in May combined with Arnulf’s different storylines that have been ejaculating from his garbled brain since July. To install it you first need to have the original 5.0 download on your harddisk and to copy / overwrite the amended files from the hack onto the existing ones.

Second. The downloadable version of ArianeB, version 5.0, dates from March 2008 and hasn’t been updated since. The online version, however, has recently been extended with about 30 pictures. Its most recent files date from the 15th of October and include a brand new Rebecca scene, a new photo shoot at the lake and a couple of amended pictures that predict some new or enhanced situations in the future. I'll call it ArianeB 5.10, just to avoid confusion.

To experience the new scenes you have to play the game online or mirror it on your harddisk, using a website copier such as Httrack. Unless you are 18 years of age you may not continue reading further on. If you masturbate too often you will go blind. Take my word for it as my diopters are 10+ (on both eyes).

Do you like tennis? (ArianeB 5.10 walkthrough [online version])

ArianeB (or Virtually date Ariane) is an adult dating simulator with a lot of different scenarios and outcomes. The story is fairly simple, make a date with Ariane and try to get her in the sack! Of course this sounds easier than it is and that is exactly what makes this game worthwhile. The best way is to experiment with the different situations the game offers and to learn from past mistakes. But for those with a restless mind I will put some walkthroughs for the game on this space. It takes out most of the fun though.

To get to Rebecca's new strip scene (that has replaced the scene from version 5.0) you need to do the following.

Introduction (a quick one)

The upgraded online version has a hidden shortcut to skip the first sixteen frames. If you move the mouse to the top left side of the introductory image and click the ‘Introduce yourself’ hotpoint this action will bring you directly to the home plan with ArianeB waiting in the living room.

Introduce yourself (top left). ArianeB stands in the living room and asks for a suggestion.
Get wine to drink.
Finish drink.

Steak Dinner

Get steaks for dinner.
Drink wine.
Finish drink.
Wait for the steaks.
Eat steak dinner.
Compliment her.
Talk to her.
Drink wine.
Go somewhere else.

Bar Brawl

Go for a drive. Ariane is a bit tipsy and wants you to drive her car.
Go for a drive. You don't need to go to the gas station.
Go downtown.
Go to the nightclub.
Go to bar.
I'm driving so club soda please.
Ask her to dance.
Keep dancing.

A guy is getting a bit too familiar with ArianeB and this ask for some drastic, albeit not aggressive, behaviour. Punching the guy will not lead to the desired situation we’re after now…

Protect ArianeB.
Get her away from this guy.
Get out of the club.
Go lingerie shopping.
Go into the lingerie store.

To continue the game ArianeB will give you 3 characteristics and you have to choose the lingerie that fits all three of them. Here are ArianeB’s possible questions:

I’m looking for underwear that’s...

comfortable, fashionable, and sexy (Take a look around).
Pick a strapless bra.
Pick a thong

comfortable, fashionable, and inexpensive (Take a look around).
Pick a sports bra.
Pick boy shorts.

inexpensive, comfortable, and sexy (Take a look around).
Pick a sports bra.
Pick a thong.

inexpensive, fashionable, and sexy (Take a look around).
Pick going braless.
Pick boy shorts.

Wait till she tries it on.
Put clothes back and buy it.

Normally Rebecca would ask you to dance at the nightclub but since you have just been kicked out there, she looks for another place to go.

Strip Club Mania

Discuss other options with Rebecca.
Be adventurous and take a chance.
Stay and watch Rebecca's show.
Continue watching.

Repeat until Rebecca's show is over.

The current game is far from finished here but most situations have been discussed in the previous walkthroughs.

One last word about Arnulf, his latest ArianeB 5.00 update manages to combine both Rebecca scenes, the one from version 5.0 and the new one from version 5.10.

In the next few weeks I shall try to talk you through the other new situations of the game.

Update : the latest walkthroughs for the ArianeB 6.21 game can be found at: The ArianeB 6.21 walkthroughs: All in one 

All ArianeB 5.0 walkthroughs can still be found on this blog:
The ArianeB 5.0 Chronicles (ArianeB 5.0 walkthrough part 1) 
Hungry Like A Wolf (ArianeB 5.0 walkthrough part 2) 
After Dinner Mints (ArianeB 5.0 walkthrough part 3)  
Games For May (ArianeB 5.0 walkthrough part 4) 
Moon And Mooning (ArianeB 5.0 walkthrough part 5) 
Photoshoot By The Lake (ArianeB 5.0 Walkthrough part 6)